by Tommy Gimler
Here’s something that Tim Tebow probably won’t be excited about. While he might be outstanding at giving circumcisions to poor African boys in the offseason, according to a new Sports Illustrated poll that asked real NFL players, Jesus Christ, Jr. was voted the most overrated player in the league.
Fireman Ed can’t be too happy about that or the fact that his starting quarterback Mark Sanchez was voted number two. Tony Romo, Michael Vick, and Ray Lewis rounded out the top five respectively. Again, keep in mind, this isn’t a poll that was answered by a bunch of Bengals or Raiders fans. I mean, odds are they wouldn’t have been able to read it. But these are Tebow’s peers who are now calling him a dog shit player.
So, the fans think Jesus sucks. All sportswriters not employed at the four-letter think he’s terrible. And now, the players think he blows. So, what in the hell was Jets’ GM Mike Tannenbaum thinking when he sent two draft picks to the Broncos and agreed to pay $2.53 million for the former Florida standout? I mean, after being on the field for just 55 plays this season, it would seem as though Tannenbaum shouldn’t have given up anything more than a used Nick Mangold prophylactic.
But enough about Tebow. If you want to read or hear more about him, I’m sure Skip Bayless is currently mumbling about him over on ESPN2. We’re going to talk about the top five players who somehow didn’t make this list:
1) Kevin Kolb – QB, Arizona Cardinals
The Cardinals signed the former Eagles quarterback to a five-year, $63 million deal ($21 million guaranteed) after he proved absolutely nothing in Philadelphia. Since then, Kolb has played in only 15 of a possible 23 games, missing time in many of those that he was able to suit up for. While his stats over those games aren’t Blaine Gabbert-pathetic (17 TD’s, 11 INT, 9 fumbles, 83 QB rating), the Cardinals could have gotten the same results by paying some other overrated douche like Matt Hasselbeck a lot less than $63 million.
2) Matt Cassel – QB, Kansas City Chiefs
There is a reason why you don’t sign quarterbacks who have spent their entire college and pro careers as a backup to a six-year, $63 million contract ($28 million guaranteed, $40.5 million in the first three years) after just one decent year of starting for a great team. And that reason is that those quarterbacks are usually fucking terrible. Cassel was on pace to throw only 13 touchdowns along with 24 interceptions this season before a concussion saved him in Week 5. Let’s just put it this way. If you’re a $63 million quarterback, and the fans are cheering for Brady Quinn to replace you as the starter, to say you are overrated is an understatement.
3) Darren McFadden – RB, Oakland Raiders
If I am running an NFL team, the first thing I do is move them out of Oakland. And when the league’s structure at the time is set up where I have to give an unproven rookie running back $60 million over six years, I expect that man to play. And when he does play, I expect him to play well. Darren McFadden hasn’t been doing either of those lately. Last year, injuries limited him to just 7 games. This year, McFadden has remained healthy enough to run the ball 103 times, but he’s averaging only 3.1 yards per carry. That’s good for 41st in the league, worse than Danny Woodhead.
4) Jermichael Finley – TE, Green Bay Packers
The Bleacer Report has referred to Finley as a superstar, but they couldn’t be further from the truth. For years, Green Bay Packers fans have been told how awesome and talented Finley is. He was supposed to be impossible for a linebacker to cover because of his speed. He was supposed to be impossible for the secondary to cover because of his size. Well, it turns out the only time that he’s impossible to cover is when he’s injured, and that seems to be about 75% of the time. When he does manage to take the field, there is no longer a need to double the Packers’ tight end because he doesn’t catch most of the balls thrown his way. He managed to find the end zone in Week One, but other than that, Finley has been a disappointment for both Packers fans and fantasy dorks.
5) Peyton Hillis – RB, Kansas City Chiefs
Hillis hasn’t even rushed for 100 yards yet this season, which means the Kansas City Chiefs are paying him $2.8 million to do nothing but just look like a total fucking douchebag:
